Anyway, there were a few times when I woke up in the middle of night thinking of you, and your sms came almost immediately like this morning!! I'm not sure if that is a kind of fate..but at least it's something worth noting coz it's not once or twice alrdy..

And during my orientation camp last June, not sure if you realised, but I was actually trying my best to reply you as fast as I can..because I knew you felt a bit insecure that I will get to know more girls and then don't want to be with you anymore. In fact, that never occurred in my mind before, I've never don't want you before..never ever..and thus, throughout the camp I was pretty isolated to text you hopefully can make you feel more secure..I didn't even attempt to talk to any of the girls..in the end, I made acquaintances rather than friends..I'm not blaming you for anything..I just hope that you can realise that even though I may not seem to care about your stuff, but actually below the "heck-care" appearance, I care a lot a lot..in fact I think sometimes I'm even more worried about you than your parents are about you..especially when you're going home late at night and when you for a period of time do not sms me between your journey from school to home, I'd be literally praying that you are fine and nothing must happen to you..becoz when I see you so tired, I am really afraid you will collapse 1 day..but now I finally know why is it sometimes you do not sms me till you're home, because someone has all the while been sending you home..haiz..maybe that was why I did feel a bit betrayed..and your defence is that it's not you to report to someone..but I don't think this is reporting, it's more of communication than reporting..haizz..

I know my previous way of loving you has been wrong..and you finally leak out something that the week before we broke, I was being very feng ci..and I totally agree..many a times I've already wanted to say "hao le laopo, let's not be difficult to each other anymore"..but I just couldn't say it..because i was really hoping that you'd realise you might have overdone certain stuff even if it can't be helped..that's why I was being very cold to you that period..but it did the reverse obviously..and when you told me, you have no regrets making the decision, I was really disappointed..

Anw, I think the punishment/retribution has come almost immediately after that night now that you are so cold to me..haizz..1 week of coldness resulted in a lifetime of regrets..laopo, forgive me and give me a chance please??even if it's not now, at least don't be so cold to me anymore le hao ma?I know I've deeply hurt you during that week and that night, but after the breakup, I am also deeply hurt by some of your words and actions and it's already 23days le..laopo, pls don't do this to me anymore le hao ma?? =(( when I gave you the letters and purposely left blank spaces for you to fill, you did not fill, I was really sad..becoz it probably mean that to you, they are just blank spaces, but to me, it means a lot more, it means my love (that's you), it means our relationship..

Anw, Jas told me that when she's with wy, she's also pretty self-conscious and will tend to be in her best to impress..I know you've done that and is tired of doing it, in fact, I've also done that just that in a more subtle manner..and both she and I agree that it is a behaviour of presenting your best self to someone you truly love..and couples quarrel are common, but I guess if the quarrel takes too long to come, it's going to be a very bad quarrel and it has proven in our case..our issues deep down is seriously lack of communication, if I had spent more time with you talking to you face to face instead of just sms-ing, things wouldn't turn out the way they are today..

I really do not wish to end up like the na xie nian movie where my true love left me after 1 night of miscommunication and stupid quarrel and end up regretting for my entire life..do you know that I do not have anymore close girl friends apart from jas who already have someone she loves?becoz all these while, I've only wanted to be with you for the rest of my life..我爱你老婆..my gut feel has been pretty much accurate and this time round, I am very sure after the 4 yrs+ together, that it'll be even more accurate that you are the one for me..sorry that i've hurt you..I really love you and wants to be with you again and hear you call me laogong again...